Art/ Badao Mountain, 5 months after my cat died, I finished this painting after crying off 3 albums, acrylic
Foreword/
After brainstorming through social interactions and testing for a while, I am about to launch my Frankilosopher project.
I believe I am an optimistic person, and my curiosity always drives me to understand things deeply. This trait makes me well-suited to be a director. However, I also realise that instead of being a filmmaker who makes a living from making films, I am more like a philosopher who graduated from the filmmaking department or, rather, a shy comedian-to-be.
Studying film in art school didn’t turn me into a blockbuster director or a great artist, but it certainly taught me a thousand ways to view life.
I love movies. I consider them the highest form and experimental expression of philosophy and art in the world. You can pack everything you hate, love, and want to discuss into a film, weaving a world that you believe needs to be observed and experienced. Movies are like a drug for idealists.
But in reality, when it comes to filmmaking, it is an extremely cumbersome process. It teaches you how to handle various life matters, work with a large group of people under time pressure, and remind you that every minute and second is money. In some ways, it can be a nightmare for idealists.
After graduating from university, I participated in the production of many short and feature films, did a lot of editing work, and even worked in an antique shop. But at that time, I had a strong desire to experience life abroad.
Later, I sold a lot of my belongings and moved to Ireland with all my possessions at the age of 26, without even booking a place to stay for a night… I lived, worked, and travelled in Europe for two years, encountering many magical experiences. It felt like my life was about to change its course completely.
Then, at the age of 28, I moved back to Taiwan. I unintentionally entered a more than two-year period of working as an in-house director in an office (a “normal” life?).
And then, poof! It seemed like I was destined not to be a “normal” person. The external tensions that accumulated through choices stretched me infinitely and then released me in an instant.
Life after 30 was a rollercoaster ride.
I started a business with my partner while struggling in an office, quit the job, made a short film about a couple fighting and won a million, broke up but continued to work together in the business, invested the prize money, took out a startup loan, faced a pandemic, endless arguments, and then willingly suffered a big financial loss to end everything. Suddenly, I became a single, indebted, and jobless person. Then, through a series of serendipitous events, I started shooting a Bboy documentary, started going to parties, met many people, and appeared in a New Year’s show at the Taipei Arena… Suddenly, I felt my life was going somewhere, and suddenly my grandmother passed away, and a month later, my cat passed away. Suddenly, I moved to a new apartment alone, started working at an environmental organization, and a few months later became a jobless wanderer again…
Meanwhile, I started dancing, rapping, playing music, painting, doing circus arts, taking daily walks and photographing, writing journals, and engaging in micro-social movements…
See, I had to pause and understand myself and the world because my life was just so absurd… And I have to admit that being a rapper feels awesome too!
I also started to believe that I have always been a fortunate person. Without these dramatic ups and downs happening within a short period of time, I wouldn’t have truly faced pain after turning 30.
Only then could I suddenly empathise with those who have experienced pain… Like war or people who are homeless due to climate change. I need to believe that I am fortunate. Although the debit knocked on my door like I hadn’t paid the rent for three months or everyone around me was telling me you were a bit too much, hey, I still had a place to live.
After going through personal pain, I started wanting to share with everyone the stories that have brought me happiness — how I perceive tragedies, the world I want to share through my experiences, the people and things I know, am curious about, and deeply appreciate.
After experiencing several cycles of separation, death, and various failures, I understood one thing:
No one truly understands someone else’s pain. But everyone can take a reference from how others deal with tragedy.
Perhaps being able to laugh even in a situation where I have accomplished nothing and experienced failures is the best way I can interact with the world. At the end of the day, I can’t lie about those great parts of being alive…
